Into That Too-Dark Corner

It's hard, you know? Cause if something upsets me, I've learned to push it all away, not think about it, throw myself into anything, anything at all, but that thing.

And time and time again, whether it's homework or something less tangible, I'm crushed by the weight of it when there's nothing to throw myself into, or the deadline is suddenly here, and I've only got a few sentences of the essay finished.

Perhaps that's why I can be such a diligent worker; I've got so many secrets, so many stressors, so many pushed-away things, that I automatically just throw myself into doing everything the best, as long as I don't have to deal.

There was a time, and I can't remember when, that I wasn't like this.

Back then, I threw things.

I definitely like that way better.

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